I'm back in Riverside.
I wrote a post just before I left Kyoto and I have yet to put it up, but it will be up in the near future.
I went back and read it after I'd been home for a few days. It's such a hopeful blog; full of optimism and happy things. I can't imagine why I was so chipper about it all.
Coming back has been, quite possibly, the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Returning for that short period over spring break didn't prepare me at all. I was in a different place then--looking for different things.
Don't ge me wrong, seeing everyone is nice and I did miss a few things here and there, but on the whole I feel like I don't fit here anymore. ...And I'm not sure I want to.
As painful as this feeling of unsettledness is, it's also motivation.
Now I just need to figure out what exactly I want to move towards.
I definitely want it to move me back towards Kansai.
Time to start planning again.
Love until later,
Caitlin D.
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